My youngest daughter graduated High School and has just wrapped up her first year in College. I'm quite proud as she finished with a 3.5 gpa, which was no easy task since this school is known for it's academics. She's back home with me now, working full time for an Abstract Company.
Without a doubt, the most heart-breaking event to take place since my last post is my on-going divorce. After 32 years of marriage, my stbx (soon-to-be-ex) has served me with divorce papers, found someone else, given her a ring and from what I understand, he's planning a life with her after our divorce is final. So much for "in sickness and in health"...
For the last two and a half years, I've been living on my own and it's been a roller coaster. Life as I knew it will never, ever be the same. I've seen the darkest of dark days, however, still hopeful for the day I come out the other side of this, which everyone says will happen eventually.
Unfortunately, the most difficult part of it all is watching my youngest daughter suffer through such emotional distress. Her sisters don't understand and why should they? They're grown, have families and lives of their own. They're not living this hell on a daily basis. I want, so badly, for her to find support from friends, family and those going through the same emotions.
It's just all been so heart-breaking. So much I don't understand. What's happening to the family unit in society today? How do men find it so easy to walk away when things get hard? Where's the love?
People call me strong. I don't feel strong.
People see a smile when I'm shattered inside.
People see a bright future for me. I can't see past today.
People can't begin to understand the rejection I feel.
People can't begin to understand this gut-wrenching pain.
People just don't understand so the support isn't there.
I'm on my own.
Hopefully, I can get back to blogging on a regular basis with more positive postings. No promises, but I'll try.
Til next time...
Stephanie
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